If you're selling anything online you still have to obey the rules of face to face selling outlined in program four of Balancing the Sale:
Your website copy needs to be about me, the nicest person in the world, the centre of the universe, the only person I think about from dawn to dusk - me - yes - your prospective buyer - the person who is going to make it worthwhile your having put the product up on the web in the first place.
Don't rave on too much about your product or yourself - unless you are the actual product.
On my website colinpearce.com I introdcue myself (because I am the product) and then I go on and talk about YOU and add a testimonial straight away.
Check it out and compare the idea with your own copy.
